“I remember the day that Cameron and I decided to have a baby. I will never forget it. We had talked about having a child together, to add to our beautiful little family, since the beginning of our relationship. We wanted to have one more, and we really wanted to have a son. One day, while on a little weekend getaway, we got serious about it. Life was crazy, but we loved each other more than the crazy! We knew that we were more than ready to bring another precious human into the world. It was the craziest thing, looking into Cameron’s eyes and seeing that he was just as serious as me when I said, “let’s have a baby, for real.” He replied with “okay, lets do this!”
“Four months later, after a whole morning of me telling myself over and over that there’s no way it would have happened so fast, I took a test. It was positive! I couldn’t believe that it had happened so quickly! We were going to have a baby!”
“I walked into the living room with that test, feeling scared but also filled with the utmost excitement. I said six words: “Are you ready to do this?” His eyes went to the test in my hand, and I watched as he realized what he was looking at. His eyes got wide as he said, “Are you serious?!” “Yes.” He came running to me, tears starting to run down his cheeks, and wrapped me up in his arms. We both laughed and cried, and we said the words “we’re having a baby” about 250 times. We both wanted a son, but neither of us cared what we would have. We knew that we were so blessed just to be pregnant!
“God knew the desire of our hearts; in May, we found out that we were expecting a little boy!”
“My due date was October 31st, but it came and went with nothing but prodromal labor. My body had been tricking me with little hints that labor was coming for a few weeks, but nothing serious had happened yet. On November 3rd, around 4:00 in the morning, I woke up with stronger contractions than what I had been experiencing so far. I decided to go back to sleep and try and get as much rest as possible. I went in and out of sleep until I woke back up around 7:00 a.m. knowing that this was real labor. I told Cameron who quickly went into gear and started getting everything ready for delivery. He made me breakfast (sausage and eggs), drew me a bath to relax in while I waited for contractions to progress, and got the birthing tub set up.”
“I hung up some lights and a string of birthing affirmations that I had made. I texted my midwife and my photographer to let them know what was going on. For the next hour or so, we watched a couple of shows, I sat on my birthing ball, Cameron rubbed my back during contractions, we smiled and laughed, I labored, and we waited.”
“At 9:54 a.m. I told Alex, my midwife, that contractions were lasting a minute long and consistently 3 minutes and 45 seconds apart. I then texted Amber, my photographer. They both headed toward the house!”
“My contractions quickly progressed into being really intense and coming within a minute or two of each other. There was little rest time between the pressure. Time became a blur when Alex and Amber showed up. I spent my time walking back and forth and hanging around Cameron’s neck.”
“At one point I was on all fours on the living room floor with Cameron sitting next to me, rubbing my neck. I can’t really explain what I felt in that moment – love, nervousness, excitement, strength, weakness. I felt my eyes welling up. I focused on my breathing and watched tears drip onto Cameron’s leg that was positioned below my head.”
“Soon, Alex asked if I was ready to get in the birthing tub. She and Cameron helped me climb in, and then Cameron climbed in behind me. At this point, I put my mind into the zone.”
“I self-checked to see if I could feel his head coming down, but I felt nothing. My brain went into panic mode. Contractions were extremely intense and very close together, but he wasn’t close enough for me to even feel. At that point, I started to really focus on breathing him down. With each contraction, I did an 8-count deep breath in and then used my breath out to push him down. After a little bit of time, I self-checked again and felt his head. Success! I had done it!”
“Everything was so quiet and peaceful. Everyone around me spoke in whispers, Cameron switched back and forth from gently rubbing my back to dripping warm water down my neck and back. I was able to completely focus everything inside of me on peacefully bringing my baby Earthside.”
“My sweet Cameron, who can break a sweat in the snow, was burning up while sitting in the birthing tub with me. He never once complained or even said a word about it, but Alex noticed and got him a cold, wet washcloth to put on his neck and cool him down. He cooled off and then handed it to me. It was the best thing to lay my head down on while I labored.”
“For the longest time – at least it felt like a long time to me – I labored with Cameron behind me, rubbing my back and telling me how great I was doing and how proud of me he was. He didn’t let three minutes go by without encouraging me in one way or another. He was my utmost strength when I began to feel weak or scared. He reminded me that I was a warrior.”
“I felt like my body was going back and forth from pushing him out to pulling him back up. I started to feel frustrated, overwhelmed by the pressure of birth, and stuck. I was getting tired. Alex came over and calmed me. She softly spoke the sweetest words over me, encouraged me, and lifted me up to power through again.”
“A few minutes later, my body told me it was time to move. I turned around to lean on Cameron and wrap my arms around his neck while I labored on my knees.”
“I was still in the zone and everything was still a blur, but I remember Cameron holding my face and encouraging me. I also remember opening my eyes for a second, looking at him and saying, “I’m so tired.” I was exhausted. He was such a rock when I needed it the most! I knew that I was fixing to push my baby out and I was so ready and so nervous at the same time. He kept telling me, over and over, “you’ve got this, sweetheart!”“
“Then, as Cameron calls it, the war cries started. I felt the need to move my position again. I leaned my back against the side of the tub and rested my legs on top of Cameron’s legs. I remember Alex telling me to relax and breathe during contractions. At one point, I yelled back in a panic, “I can’t relax!””
“I had let the fear in my brain take over for a minute, and I was freaking out! He wasn’t going to come out. It was going to hurt too bad. I wasn’t going to be strong enough. BUT… I remembered my strength, I listened to the encouraging voices from Cameron and my birth team of strong women surrounding me, and I trusted that God had given me the ability to do this. I was born for this. I was able to relax my body and breathe through contractions again. Looking back on it, I feel like my brain went to a completely different place. A calm place. I was solely focused on bringing him down and getting him out so that I could see his face and rest.”
“In no time, I felt him crowning. I heard Alex call out to her nurse, Laura, that he was still in caul. As soon as his head was all the way out, my water broke. Pause. In between contractions, my baby sat between two worlds. I heard Alex encourage me to relax. I did. In that moment that felt like forever, I did everything in my power to relax every muscle in my body and breathe. I felt the next contraction coming and I pushed him the rest of the way out.”
“At 12:44 p.m., Cameron caught our son and lifted him up to me. Killian was so calm and alert. He stared up at me, not crying, and I stared right back. “Hi! You look like your daddy!””
“Nine pounds, 20.75 inches long - he is the most perfect, little boy!”
“Cameron cried the happiest tears and I have never been so in love in my whole life!”
“We counted his fingers and counted his toes. We marveled at every bit of him.”
“After resting in the pool for a little bit longer, Cameron and my birth team helped me out of the birthing tub and into bed. I delivered my placenta and Cameron cut the cord, officially releasing our little boy from “womb life.””
“I rested in the comfort and warmth while everything was checked and vitals were taken. Everything was still so peaceful. Cameron sat by my side, stroked my face and hair, and gave me lots of kisses while telling me he was so proud.”
“After a bit of time, Cameron got to wrap his son up in his arms for the first time. He slowly paced around the living room, talking to him, praying over him, and crying the happiest tears. It’s the most masculine thing I have ever seen him do, being the biggest, most gentle father to this tiny, precious boy.”
“He also got to weigh him. We sure were surprised when that scale hit nine pounds!”
“Then Killian and I climbed in our herbal bath and relaxed. I could feel the tension that was setting in from the hardest workout in my life. The warm, herbal bath washed them away.”
“Then back to my comfy bed, where Killian latched on and starting nursing like a champ!”
“My amazing birth team finished up, cleaned and tidied, gave me sweet hugs and a southern goodbye, and headed out the door. Then we finally got to introduce Killian to his three big sisters who were just DYING to meet him!”
“Welcome to the world, Killian Justice Mikael!” ~Arica Mikael
